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I pulled up in the lane behind him, a few cars down. I saw his gold Volvo parked exactly where he had described it would be. I secretly booked a day off work and my stomach was turning over and over as I drove into the car park. The time and place was arranged, I would drive to near his home, meet him in a supermarket car park and we would go for a coffee. I knew what he liked and I trusted him so next time he said "It would be better if I was with him for real" I suggested that we should meet, if only for coffee. He knew everything about me, he was the first person to know everything about me. I was soon phoning him every day and now I really wanted to meet him too. One day, shocking myself, I suggested I could phone him. He never pushed but seemed happy that I would be online and do as he asked. He lived about ninety miles away, I deliberately avoided anyone too close. He was Gay, 52 and was living on his own, he was out and enjoyed it to the full. I built a long standing online relationship with this one guy, who was Dom but very kind too.
I became a gay cyber slut, ignoring anyone who wanted to meet up on the first or second chat, that was way to scary! I had an alter ego who was a submissive slut and soon became to realise that it was nearer the truth than I dared believe. It seemed a natural step to go to a chat room, I was in heaven, I could communicate with guys, tell them how I really felt, I could arouse them. Not a wimp in sight! I was becoming so liberated by the knowledge that I was not alone and that I could enjoy this. It was natural progression to find the gay sites and the revelation of the gay bear and the BDSM sites. I found myself licking my lips and having an enormous hard-on covered in precum. I was envious of every woman with a cock in her mouth. I would surf the web for hours and hours mesmerised by hard cocks and delicious pictures of oral sex. Then I found lots of pictures of men, sexy men, not wimps but real men. I first discovered the obvious porn sites, I browsed pages and pages of photographs of women sucking on cock, I knew that more and more I was looking at the cocks not the women. Suppressed that is until I was thirty five years old and discovered the internet. I am a naturally submissive person, unfortunately so is my wife, so these feelings were also suppressed. I married had three children and kept all those best sexy thoughts for private moments alone. The fact the thought of a hard cock made my mouth go dry and my stomach tingle.Īll this was pushed out of mind because I knew I was not attracted to the stereotype gay. The fact that I found the sight of naked guys so arousing.
The fact that my first wank was about a guy after watching one of those old black & white deep south cotton plantation movies.
I ignored the obvious signs that did not fit the image. Perhaps it was my protection against my curiosity, I was not at all like that so I must be 100% straight. The gay community was all hairdressers and limp wristed wimp types. I had always been curious, but much too engrained in the straight guy perception of all things gay.